(no subject)
mood swing
It seems to me that at certain times communication can be overrated. When you try to talk to a friend and give them advice that would generally make their life so much easier yet they don't take it AND continue to complain about no answers to their "sad situation" it makes you want to pull your hair out. Sometimes its better to nod and just say the things they want to hear. It'll definitely save from having to argue with a friend about something that will undoubtedly be completely inane six months from now.

Speaking of pulling hair out, I am having a bout of alopecia. That's great, thanks so much universe. If you unaware of what it is, its a form of hair loss, where you lose in hair in round patches. It can affect anywhere on the body but for now seems mostly constrained to my head, which of course means my hair looks kind of funny right now. The treatment sucks, because you have to get these shots of anti inflammatory injected directly into the infected areas. There is no known cause or sure fire cure, the dermatologist said it could take anywhere from 2 months to a year to see improvement. Most cases it does go into some remission and hair grows back normally....until then, the hair growing back in the areas is white....yes, not grey, WHITE. All I can do is laugh and deal but really, the thing I vainly like the most about myself is f'n letting me down.

It's hard to believe its actually harder to date and have less drama as you get older. I swear relationships and flirting did not come with so much disclaimer as it seems to as I age. I sort of wish I'd just settled and married 10 years ago and didn't have to deal with this, I've lost belief in ever actually being with someone who is "made for me" because in honesty the girl who was made for me, I've met and we were a disaster. I know she's a soul mate but she's not one that I could live a life with in this existence. I jsut want a normal, nice girl, to be a partner and share things with. I dont need "gaga love" (I'm not talking Lady Gaga), just someone who can be normal for more than a few minutes without losing their marbles over things that don't need to be made so complicated. Maybe I'm jsut destined to be single forever. It's sad to say but I feel it more every day.

I notice more and more with every passing sunny day, that I do get quite the high off the yellow sun. I'm thinking I will one day need to live a life on a secluded beach somewhere. Maybe then i'll find an island girl who doesn't speak English and I wont have to worry about dealing with drama or at least if there is any, I won't know about it because I won't have a clue what she's saying.

Ignorance really can be bliss....

(no subject)
Ugh, long Friday already, barely half way through, this week has been dragging itself by which is kinda strange since i've been running all over hells half acre.

Wednesday night I went to Fort Macleod to pick up karaoke books and a tv for a private party on Saturday, the party is in Nanton though. So tomorrow I have to work all day and then get out of here around 4:30 and head straight there to set up and be starting around 7:30. Well at least I get free food (prime rib) out of the deal AND i make pretty good money for 4 hours of "work".

Some days long distance relationships really suck. Like when you just really want to see somebody,it's hard that they are three hours away. I'm starting to look forward to the day when we both end up in the same city, although no clue whatsoever which city that will be. I want to convince her to move here for the better winters and all but I think I might lose the battle to what's best for her kids. We'll see, it's not in the immediate future but it is something that's definitely on my mind these days. Knowing it will be mroe than a month between seeing each other is not as easy as I had hoped.

Tonight I plan to do nothing.....watch a movie and get all sleeped up for tomorrow's day. Sunday will probably be spent in recovery mode watching football, or if i get ambitious I may go out and look for a dresser....which reminds me time to do a little hunting online to see what's out there.....or maybe i should be working.

(no subject)
Christmas was excellent. The family took to the new GF and she had a great time. We stayed up late playing cards on Christmas Eve and i got my ass kicked all night by GF and brother's GF...it was pretty comical. Got up early to do the gift opening, watching my brother's kids rip into the presents is always a good time.

Shortened version....lol....got home on Sunday night and we went with some friends to see "The Tourist"....please if you have any sense in your head do not bother with this movie. Don't even rent it. It's that terrible. Such a waste of two hours but we went to the Phoenix Grill in Westhills and had really yummy butternut squash ravioli before the movie, so it wasn't all bad. Plus the company rocked.

Got a wicked eye infection on Tuesday, my whole eye was swollen shut, it didn't get better til today after some drops and antibiotics. It was weird though, my vision was totally blurry all day yesterday but considering I could barely see out of my eye it's not surprising.

Going to Edmonton tomorrow for New Year's and meeting the GF's kids, should be a lot of fun and a little nerve racking but it will be a great time. We were just going to stay in but now it sounds like her sister is trying to get us to go out with her and her husband. I guess we will see....

I just hope the roads are good tomorrow, I won't even get out of here til after 3PM because of work, unless i can work some magic to leave early. Off work til Wednesday, gotta take full advantage!

Hope you all enjoyed your holidays!

(no subject)
Twelve songs that are your favorites. (in no particular order)
12. Afterlife - Avenged Sevenfold
11. Hotblack - Oceanship
10. Run - Snow Patrol
9. King of Wishful Thinking - Go West
8. Home For A Rest - Spirit of the West
7. Laid - James
6. Love Song - Cure
5. We Can Work It Out - Beatles
4. All Uncovered - Watchmen
3. Radio Orchid - Fury In The Slaughterhouse
2. Coax Me - Sloan
1. Creep - Radiohead

Eleven things you love
11. Color Blue
10. Family
9. Friends
8. Calgary Flames
7. New Car
6. Kissing
5. Music
4. Having money to do stuff, lol
3. Life
2. Love
1. Her

Ten random things about yourself.
10. I had a lisp when i was a kid, had to take speech therapy, still don't love the letter "S"
9. Favorite number is 10
8. Was a Montreal Canadiens fan as a kid, until Calgary moved to town
7. My brothers and i used to stand and salute during the national anthem at hockey games when kids....even when it was on TV
6. My dad and brother both nearly died on the same day and they were 100's of miles apart when it happened.
5. I'm excited for Christmas
4. Used to be a very good hockey player, that was until I discovered other things in life and gave up playing
3. Wrote a bunch of short stories in high school that I thought one day would be published....i was such a dreamer....and I lost them all
2. HATE winter mornings....the dark kills me inside
1. I once blew out all the power in the science lab in junior high, testing the question "why shouldn't you stick tweezers in a light socket"

Nine movies that you love. (in no specific order)
9. Day After Tomorrow
8. Armageddon
7. Die Hard
6. Chasing Amy
5. Summer Story
4. Mystery, Alaska
3. Bad Boys
2. Rebel Without A Cause
1. Back to The Future (all three)

Eight things that you hate.
8. Drama
7. Waiting
6. not getting enough sleep
5. cold mornings
4. insomnia
3. slow computers
2. bad drivers
1. check engine lights

Seven things you did today.
7. woke up
6. came to work
5. kissed my girlfriend
4. packed the car
3. this meme
2. went for lunch
1. prayed for the day to end

Six words you'd use to describe yourself.
6. funny
5. Intelligent
4. Loving
3. honest
2. aware
1. sometimes i'm selfish, yes i can admit it, lol

Five things you are thinking now.
5. when is it over.
4. can't wait to see the nieces and nephew
3. I should be working
2. I dont care
1. I get a whole weekend with her!

Four things you are waiting for.
4. Christmas
3. Summer
2. BC holiday
1. this day to end

Three things you regret.
3. being out of shape
2. don't really regret much else.

Two websites you often visit.
2. Pulse Music Board
1. Facebook, I guess, not as much as I used to

One thing that has changed your life forever.
1. Nothing has changed my life FOREVER.....yet.....I'm hoping that as things move along, being with her will do that though.

(no subject)
Since I probably won't get on again until the new year, Merry X-mas and Happy New Year to all. Have a great time over the holidays and enjoy all that you can!

It's beginning to look....
I'm crazy excited for christmas this year....and it all comes down to the fact that the new girl in my life( which is going awesome ) is coming to my parents. It's pretty funny because she hasn't met them yet so it took a long time for her to agree because she's super nervous about meeting the whole family in one shot.

*side note* - Her kids are with their dad this year and she would have ended up being alone at Christmas which was never an option, it just took her a really long time to finally give me a definitive yes! lol

I'm happier than I've been in years and it's an incredibly nice happy, not crazy intense, sometimes wicked happy, sometimes wanting to smother someone happy(like I was with Reta). She's amazing and I'm pretty sure I found the real thing. She's very grounded and the future is exciting once again.

Now it will come down to the day when we have to decide who goes where, because she lives in Edmonton.....oh well, til that day I won't bother to stress it.

End of an era
So tomorrow I hop a plane to Edmonton and pick up a new vehicle, it's a pretty exciting thing to be doing. While I'm there I'll also get to see my girlfriend (yes, she lives there, which is kinda convenient for tomorrow's trip). Now it's time to say bub bye to the old car

My 2003 Intrepid was a great car and it's one that i'm always glad to have owned, it was my first with a sunroof, which I didn't use as much as I thought I would. It was time though, it still runs really well but it has a few little things that need to be fixed and i didn't feel like putting the money into it...so instead I spent a bunch on a 2010 GMC Terrain. I'm happy about the fact that I will now be climbing into the vehicle instead of sitting way down low. Having the extra room will be great too, especially if and when I have to DJ and move equipment. Once I have it I will try to post pictures but I'm not great at that stuff, lol

Cheers to my three friends still out there....i still read you all the time and wish the best for ya! And to anyone randomly dropping by.....what's up ;)

I'm off to Vegas on Sunday!

It's been nine long years since i went on a real vacation I'm soooooo excited about it and in a strange twist of absolute coincidence my NEW girl is actually going at the same time. Longer story about her but it was funny when we started talking that we realized we were going at the same time and staying in the same hotel! Going to be good times.

Hopefully don't come home to broke, lol

(no subject)
Dear Diary....

A few weeks ago I met a girl online, we've been chatting quite a bit since we met and we had some great chemistry through those conversations. Now I've done the online dating thing before so I knew how it could all go down when we finally got around to meeting so I was EXTREMELY nervous about actually getting together but it had gotten to the point where we had to meet and find out if there was really something there. Sooooooooo...

Today we finally met. After all the talking and feeling comfortable with each other she actually asked if I just wanted to go and hang out at her place. Figuring that's as good a place as any I got up all the nerve I could and went over. I thought at the least if there wasn't the physical chemistry and attraction we could at least just hang out as friends. Now at this point, I know what you're thinking, this sounds very ominous that it did NOT go well.

I got to her house and texted her that I was there (she had said she would come outside and meet me). As she walked out from her basement suite to the front of the house my heart was literally beating like crazy, I felt like a teenager anticipating way more than I should have. When I saw her walking towards me though I was completely stunned that I was INSTANTLY attracted to her. She was beautiful to me the second I laid eyes on her for real. All the anxiety kind of slid away, even though I had no idea how she would feel about me but that quickly was laid to rest when she gave me a huge hug and we went inside.

We hung out and talked, touched, cuddled and just enjoyed each other's company for the next four hours. It was pretty fantastic I must say. Even though I still have some old "walls" up from some recent pain, I found myself very comfortable with her and she got very comfortable with me. There are definite possibilites here.

Everything however is not going to be easy for reasons I won't get into on here right now but I do hope that we find a way for her to be able to fully trust that I am the kind of guy I have told her I am. She's been burnt a lot and recently so I know she has some walls built up too even though we were pretty close tonight physically. I just hope that whatever happens she gives me the chance to prove that I can be different than the recent douchebags she's dated.

Really though when it comes down to it, I'm just glad that FINALLY I'm really moving past my last relationship that fucked me up for so long. I'm happy to know that I'm ready and willing to move on in my heart and find that someone special whether it's this girl or not.

It was a great night. Here's hoping that there are many more to come!

(no subject)
Dear Lottery....

Thanks for nothing.


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